People writing “your” when they mean “you’re” makes you cringe. The song “The Way I Are” makes your hair stand on end. You can’t read user comments on websites anymore because you can feel brain cells dying off just trying to make sense of them. You, dear friend, are a grammar geek. As such, there are books that constitute required reading for those of your ilk. After you’re done editing this article, proceed to your nearest bookstore and purchase these must-have titles for rolling in the depths of grammar.
Eats, Shoots & Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Punctuation by Lynne Truss The first step in coping with your geekdom is admitting you have a problem. Now that you’ve done that, crack open this book by self-avowed grammar stickler Lynne Truss. In her witty style she’ll reassure you that there are dozens (dozens!) of us grammar Nazis, and we need not apologize for fighting to preserve proper English.
The Elements of Style, Fourth Edition by William Strunk Jr. and E.B. White: Journalists out there should already be familiar with this brief tract that is considered the bible of professional writers. Since 1979, Strunk and White’s classic grammar manual has been adeptly and succinctly teaching readers the “elementary rules of usage,” “elementary rules of composition,” and “matters of form.” No self-respecting grammar hound would be caught dead without a copy.
The Deluxe Transitive Vampire: The Ultimate Handbook of Grammar for the Innocent, the Eager, and the Doomed by Karen Elizabeth Gordon: We can safely assume given their popularity that for some of you, your geekiness is not exclusive to grammar. Vampires are all the rage right now, but unfortunately the literature is lacking. Karen Elizabeth Gordon solves that problem and kills two birds with one neck bite by combining grammar humor with bloodsuckers.
Garner’s Modern American Usage by Bryan A. Garner: If you hit people over the head about grammar, don’t use this book; you might kill someone. The 1,000-page third edition from grammarian Bryan Garner features more than 10,500 entries, meaning if it’s not in there, for God’s sake just let it be. Despite being so bulky it’s a readable and entertaining resource for all your nitpicking needs.
The Great Typo Hunt: Two Friends Changing the World, One Correction at a Time by Jeff Deck and Benjamin D. Herson: As grammar sticklers, we’ve all wished at some point that we could walk up to a sign with bad grammar and just fix it, right then and there. Jeff Deck and Ben Herson actually lived the dream, and this book is the result of their quest to fix sloppy sign grammar in America.
Things That Make Us (Sic): The Society for the Promotion of Good Grammar Takes on Madison Avenue, Hollywood, the White House, and the World by Martha Brockenbrough: This one is Eats, Shoots & Leaves after a few drinks. As the title says, Martha Brockenbrough throws the gauntlet down on no less than the world and its bad, bad grammar in this raucous book that covers grammar in unexpected places, like Mark Foley sexts.
Woe Is I: The Grammarphobe’s Guide to Better English in Plain English by Patricia T. O’Conner: Hailing from The New York Times, Patricia O’Conner has the cred to make her a grammar authority. But this book excels on the strength of her humor and deft treatment of traditionally dry points of good English. Dig in to chapters like “Comma Sutra” and “Verbal Abuse: Words on the Endangered List.”
Forgotten English by Jeffrey Kacirk: Only grammar nerds get excited when they come across words they’ve never heard before. With Forgotten English, Jeff Kacirk has compiled hundreds of delightful words that have passed out of usage, though we can’t imagine why. Who wouldn’t get a kick out of using words like “nimgimmer” or “mumpsimus?”
The Chicago Manual of Style by University of Chicago Press Staff: With its plain white cover and electric orange body, “style” clearly refers to writing style, not fashion sense. But when writers and grammarians face a question of capitalization or abbreviation, they turn to the latest edition of CMOS and then the matter is settled once and for all.
The Associated Press Stylebook and Briefing on Media Law 2011 by Associated Press: You are a serious grammar geek; one stylebook just isn’t going to cut it. Round out your collection with the AP’s style bible for journalists, complete with briefing on media law! Never again will you have to wonder if “IMF” is acceptable for International Monetary Fund on first reference.
Grammar Girl’s Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing by Mignon Fogarty: We know it’s not cool to rip on people’s names, but sheesh, no wonder she goes by “Grammar Girl.” As grammar geeks you need no introduction to podcast star Grammar Girl, who has been solving your word usage and syntax conundrums since mid-2006. The book has all the grammar wisdom you’ve come to expect from Double-G.
The Only Grammar Book You’ll Ever Need: A One-Stop Source for Every Writing Assignment by Susan Thurman: Obviously we disagree with the title (hello, you need 15 grammar books). But this one does merit a place on the list. English teacher Susan Thurman covers important grammatical principles for good writing in a concise, inexpensive package. It is especially recommended for non-native speakers, as it explains why certain words and phrases just sound better.
You Are What You Speak: Grammar Grouches, Language Laws, and the Politics of Identity by Robert Lane Greene: This book is like The da Vinci Codeof grammar. Well-known author Robert Greene circles the globe investigating the way language has been a function of politics and identity since the time of the Tower of Babel. It’s a fascinating read that may have you reconsidering your stickler stances.
The Little, Brown Handbook, 12th Edition by H. Ramsey Fowler: With a straightforward name like this, you know you’re in for no-nonsense grammar protocol. The 12th edition now includes rules for writing online and citing Internet sources. It’s intended for students but for the true grammar geek, language education never ends.
My Grammar and I Or Should That Be Me?: Old School Ways to Improve Your English by J.A. Wines and Caroline Taggart: For those times you find yourself stumped and Strunk and White are silent on the matter, chances are Wines and Taggart have the answer. Need to know the plural of talisman or the singular of graffiti? They’re in here. You can even prove your grammar superiority by playing “Smart Aleck trivia” with your geeky friends.
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