Wednesday, September 21, 2011

9 fake SNL Products We'd Actually Buy

Over the years, Saturday Night Live has produced some hilarious sketches and characters. But some of the show's funniest moments, especially in recent seasons, have come from their commercials for fake products. Many of the ads are for items you would never want to use, like Bad Idea Jeans or BabySpanx, but some of the ideas are actually pretty good even if they are a bit silly. If these nine products were real, we would definitely buy them.

  1. Damn It, My Mom Is On Facebook filter

    If Mark Zuckerberg would let Facebook users buy this filter, he'd be a millionaire. Well, he'd be even more of a millionaire. The current Facebook privacy settings have nothing on the Damn It, My Mom Is On Facebook filter. This filter helps keep your statuses, photos, and wall mom-friendly while letting you post whatever you want. Damn It, My Mom Is On Facebook seems like a legitimate, real-world solution to the growing problem of parents jumping on the social networking site, embarrassing their children, and discovering their kids' disappointing life choices. It will edit any references to drugs, alcohol, or sex so that you can keep your mother/child relationship intact.

  2. Duncan Hines Brownie Husband

    It may be a stereotype that single women are lonely and fill the void in their lives with chocolate, but stereotypes are based at least a little bit on truth. The Brownie Husband would have a sizeable market in cat ladies alone if it were introduced in reality, and people outside of its target audience would probably be interested after a particularly tough day. Not only does the Brownie Husband have a handsome fudge face, but he heats up in 90 seconds in the microwave and is filled with delicious warm caramel. Maybe we wouldn't eat Brownie Husband in bed, but it'd be good for a dinner party, bridal shower, or quiet nights watching movies on the couch. If it's good enough for Tina Fey, it's good enough for the rest of us.

  3. Old Glory Insurance

    There's nothing more terrifying to humans today than the idea of a robot takeover. We'd probably rather die at the hands of zombies than robots; at least zombies used to be people. That's why Old Glory Insurance is so tempting. Most insurance policies these days don't cover the possibility of robot attacks, so the only way to be fully prepared for the future that we've seen in totally believable movies like I, Robot and Terminator 4 is to buy something like Old Glory Insurance. Though Saturday Night Live promotes the product as something for old people because their medication attracts the 'bots, we think it'd be a wise investment for anyone living in the 21st century. If Old Glory would cover both robot and zombie attacks, their business would skyrocket.

  4. Bug Off

    This product is slightly cruel, but if you've ever had a roach problem in your house or apartment, you'll see how entirely necessary it is to give your pests something to think about. Bug Off catches the roach in glue, rips off its legs with tiny tweezers and then beats the roach with them. As the roach goes through more and more torture, the viewing window allows you to watch to make sure Bug Off's getting the job done. While regular bug sprays or poisons just kill the bug, this is the kind of product that sends a message to all roaches letting them know that you mean business and they better stay off your property. We probably wouldn't use this on our first attempt to get rid of bugs, but if the problem is persistent and annoying enough, this is the most satisfying option.

  5. Nelson's Baby Toupees

    People will try to tell you that there's no such thing as an ugly baby, but that just isn't true. Babies come in all shapes and sizes, and some of those shapes and sizes aren't very cute. Being bald only adds to the problem. But there's nothing more adorable than a baby dressed up like an adult. These baby toupees would be the perfect accessory for a Halloween costume, a good look for a photo shoot, or a funny pick-me-up for sleep-deprived parents. Whether you have an ugly baby or not, no one will be able to see past the precious wig on its head. You could even be starting off a prosperous career for your baby as a Donald Trump impersonator.

  6. Bathroom Monkey

    The Bathroom Monkey is a live monkey that keeps your bathroom clean for up to eight months. Maybe some of the details of this product need to be worked out in order to satisfy PETA, but overall, this seems like an item that every household needs. Monkeys have been trained to fly in space and pick pockets, so it's pretty reasonable to assume that they could be taught to clean a bathroom. It would be like a pet that pitches in with the housework. If the makers could come up with a better way of disposing the used product and cut down the working hours of the monkey, the Bathroom Monkey would have a real chance of surviving in the marketplace and hopefully your bathroom.

  7. Dissing Your Dog training videos

    Some people don't have the right personality to discipline a dog during the training process. You have to assert a certain amount of straightforward authority in traditional training programs, so for the more passive-aggressive type of dog owner, these methods are normally ineffective. That's why the Dissing Your Dog videos would be such a great alternative in the real world. By using sarcasm and insults against your puppy, it'll learn how to behave and will probably feel more like your friend, since you probably treat your human buddies the same way. If it really works, it'd be a fun method to try on children, too.

  8. Taco Town

    It's hard to believe that a restaurant or state fair doesn't already sell something like the taco at Taco Town. To be more exact, it's Taco Town's pizza crepe taco pancake chili bag, but that's a ridiculous name for such a sophisticated meal. Its delicious overindulgence is the kind of thing everyone should try at least once. Though it's probably not wise to make a habit of ordering this taco, every once in a while, you've got to forget the diet and live a little. As it wraps together Italian, Mexican, French, and American cuisine, the taco is representative of the U.S. melting pot. Or the U.S. multi-layer taco, if you're looking for a more precise metaphor.

  9. Einstein Express

    This could be the least greedy and most practical use of time travel anyone's thought of. Einstein Express allows you to send a package back in time to the day when you should've taken it to the post office or UPS store. As we can see in the commercial, the service has many different uses, such as sending contraceptives into the past to prevent unplanned pregnancies. The possibilities are endless and would probably keep you out of a lot of trouble at work or in your personal life. A similar SNL service called Jiffy Express isn't quite as effective since a time machine isn't involved, but the company offers to put fake shipping dates on your package and fabricate shipping delays to explain why a parcel didn't arrive on time, taking the blame for your tardiness.

Taken From Best Online Colleges

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