10 Reasons it Can be Hard to Adopt a Child

There is nothing more precious than the gift of a child. Unfortunately hundreds of thousands of couples experience infertility every year and are robbed of this gift. When there are so many people who desperately want children why are there so many kids in the foster care system? Worldwide there are orphanages filled with children who are in need of a family, so why don’t the two join forces and solve both problems? It seems like the adoption process should be an easy one, but often it’s not, and families have to jump through hoops to solidify adopting a child. Check out 10 reasons it can be hard to adopt a child.

1. Too old: There are times when agencies will have an age range for parents wanting to adopt. If you are in your mid to late 50’s you may be considered too old to adopt a child. The reasoning is that so many things can go wrong with your health as you age and it is taxing to take care of a child. It’s not fair, but it is the case at some agencies.
2. Too young: Often times international agencies won’t allow an adoption for people in their 20’s. They want couples that are more mature, know what they want, and are prepared for everything involved with adoptions. There are agencies that will allow a young married couple to adopt, but you may have to look harder for them and wait longer for a child.
3. Very expensive: The adoption process can be an extremely expensive one to undertake. Often you are looking at about $20,000 just for the fees to pay everyone involved with the process. If you adopt internationally you will then have the added expense of travelling overseas to pick up your child. Many times problems arise and the child cannot go with you the first time you come over so you may have the cost of multiple trips overseas.
4. Restrictive Laws: No country will allow gay couples to adopt a child jointly. Sometimes singles are allowed to adopt, but if you are living with someone else this will come up in the home study. It has been done and there are ways around everything, but often these are private adoptions not through an agency.
5. Not a large enough house: When a home study is done on your residence they will factor in a lot of different variables. If you have another child of a different sex it is required that these children each have their own bedroom. You will need to make sure that you have enough bedrooms to accommodate the new child.
6. Health concerns: If one person in the adopting couple comes down with a serious life threatening disease this may slow down the adoption process. The thought behind that is that all focus will be on the person fighting for their life and not the new child, which is an understandable one. Once the husband or wife has beaten cancer or whatever it is then the process can get back on track.
7. Marriage concerns: The adoption process is very stressful and if the married couple separate during an adoption process it is likely that the process will go on hold until the couple resolves their differences. Agencies don’t like to put a child into a household filled with discourse. The child will come with its own emotional baggage.
8. Home inspection concerns: People that rent are allowed to adopt children, but you do need to have a home that is safe for a child. If there is flaking lead paint on the walls and a water leak in the ceiling that could fall and harm a child then they are not likely to place a child with you until the problems are resolved.
9. Not married to your partner: Many people feel like marriage is just a piece of paper and that it’s not important. They feel committed to their partner and question why marriage is such a big deal. In other countries there is a stricter moral code and they feel like a couple should be married before they begin raising a child together. To get around this, private adoptions are another option that you can look into.
10. Single male: While many countries will allow adoptions for singles it is harder for a single male to adopt a child versus a single female. There are more concerns about putting a child with a man due to the potential for abuse. It’s not fair, but it is the fact in many countries and many agencies that they won’t allow a single male to adopt. Some agencies will though, so just keep looking and you may find an agency that will help you.

Taken From Au Pair